So, I’ve been doing mini-photo shoots as I’ve been updating abdominaladhesiontreatment.com. Because I am such a firm believer that movement is one of the most essential parts of abdominal adhesion recovery, I am including some fun belly yoga pics on the site, one of which is elbow wheel . . .
The “Duh” part of this post was that at one point the perfect light started to change and I was rushing to get everything just perfect for the pic. And, of course, because I was rushing, I thought to myself, “This is a dangerous pose to rush, Iz, take it easy, it’s not worth an injury.” But because I’m kind of a maniac type-A in these “get-er-done” situations I still rushed and as I pushed up into the pose then lowered onto my elbows, my ponytail got caught under my head and suddenly most of my weight was on my totally off-center neck.
So I squiggled out of the pose and could feel that I had tweaked a couple of neck vertebrae. My immediate impulse was to keep powering through but then my training came through and said, “Stop it! Stretch your neck now and then pack it up. You’re done for the day.” So I did stretch, I took care of myself for the rest of the day and I tried again the next day. Thankfully, during a well-timed uttanasana, the neck vertebrae clunked back into place but my muscles were still sore.
Why am I telling you all of this? Just to think out loud a little about the challenges of balancing drive with reasonable action. Just to shed a little light on what’s underneath the drive for me, as well as some of the consequences of it.
I’m not sad I hurt myself – that’s just life. I am sad I hurt myself out of haste, out of my own vague and strange anxieties about what would happen if I didn’t get just the right shot. I am bummed my self-injury came out of vanity, rather than out of a desire to try something new, to explore some new territory in the pose, or to practice it in a deeper way than I have previously.
I guess that’s why I’m really writing this post . . . to try to make the injury useful, to make my experience of myself in those moments useful to myself. Who knows if it will work. :}